Monthly Archives: May 2013
He’s funny. I laugh constantly when I’m around him.
He wraps his arms around me all night, sleeps as close to me as he can get.
He accepts every part of me, even the bad parts.
We can talk openly about anything and everything, even if we don’t always agree.
He’s my protector – when he’s near I feel safe.
He loves my children…even those he hasn’t met yet.
He’s open to new ideas and new ways of thinking.
He gives me my space when I need it.
He cooks for me – and loves doing it.
He rubs oil on my back when I ask him to.
He gives me hugs whenever I need them.
He tells the world that I’m his and he’s mine.
He listens to me when I just need to talk.
He’s introduced me to his family and friends – and they have all welcomed me with open arms.
He shares equally in the cost of living and in household chores.
He tells me I’m beautiful.
He forgives me when I make mistakes.
He encourages me on my path of personal growth.
He’s loud and obnoxious – just like me.
He’s a natural poet – I love his writing.
He recognizes when he’s made mistakes and strives to be a better man.
He is my best friend.
I’m so grateful for the man in my life and look forward to many years of growth and love between us.
I’m loving how my life is coming together so quickly. A month ago I was heartbroken, betrayed, lonely and bored. Tonight I’m sitting in my home, my daughter and boyfriend are downstairs playing games, the kitty goes back and forth between the living room and my bedroom. I’ve been smiling and laughing all week.
I’ve had to fight and work for all that I have, but when I consider the blessings in my life (including the beautiful naked man that just stood in front of me) I am so content.
This time next month my other daughter will be home. I will in 2 months have gone from a family of one to a family of 5. I’m making plans for our future and I’m thrilled about what is to come.
Thank you universe for seeing and hearing my needs and for showering me with love.
On the morning of May 8, 2011 I woke up from a drunken stupor. I was angry with my boyfriend over a fight we’d had the night before, and was miserable in my life. I started a fight with my boyfriend, which ended with me being beaten severely by him. When the beating was done, I went into the bathroom and sobbed. I looked in the mirror at my terrible face and through the pain and misery my eyes opened up for the first time in many years.
I made a resolution then and there to never touch alcohol again. I knew that it was the cause of much of the misery I’d experienced in my life and I was determined to not allow it to control my actions or my life any longer. When I first told friends and family that I was done drinking, there was much disbelief. They had heard this from me before and it had never stuck in the past. This time, I knew it was going to be different.
I recovered from the beating, left my boyfriend and moved into a new apartment. Initially I was extremely lonely. Most of my friends at the time were bar flies and because I was no longer drinking I lost many friends. I started making new friends at the AA meetings and clean and sober events that I was attending. After a few months I felt like AA was just a replacement addiction and so I quit attending the meetings, still resolute in my decision to never touch alcohol again.
I began meditating and running. In my new apartment I no longer had cable TV or radio so I spent much of my time reading and writing. I had a few friends who were still faithful to me and supportive of my decision to remain sober and I relied heavily on their support. It was so hard to FEEL my emotions for the first time and not be able to blanket them with alcohol. Rather than being miserable in my emotions, I reveled in them. It proved to me that I was still alive, still capable of feeling – something I had thought I’d forgotten how to do.
By the time I was sober for a year I felt very secure in my sobriety, however I was still miserable in my job and longed to have my family back. In April of 2012 I quit my full time job on a leap of faith in order to get into a much better career. Many people were leery of this move because it meant I would go from 40 hours a week to 18 hours a week, and I could barely make ends meet even at my full time job. I did it anyways because I knew it was the right move to make.
I did what I had to over the next 11 months to keep my rent paid and keep food on my table. At first I did massage in my free time, but massage is very draining and most of my clientele wanted more than massage, which was very demoralizing to me. In June of that year I met a man who needed a place to stay. I needed help with rent and was tired of doing massage so I invited him to move in with me. I ended up falling in love with this man, but in December he had a relapse on his drug of choice. I was devastated and had to end things with him. I explained how difficult my sobriety had been for me and that I couldn’t have things of that nature in my home and in my life. We are still friends and he hasn’t relapsed since. I’m very proud of the progress he is making in his life.
In January of this year I was offered a full time job with my new employer. Along with the job came a beautiful 3-bedroom home in a rural part of Northern Washington. I moved into my new home in February and have been working on getting settled in. Last week my oldest daughter moved back in with me after nearly seven years of living with my sister. In June my middle daughter will be coming to visit for 6 weeks to decide if she too would like to move back in with me. My son has decided to stay with my sister since she is the only mom he knows, and I’m ok with that.
These last two years have been a true roller coaster ride for me. I’ve had many ups and downs. I’ve learned many lessons and have had to come to terms with many hurtful things I did while drinking. But my life now is so completely different from what it was 2 years ago. I am happy; I am at peace and I love life – the good and the bad parts.
Today I am celebrating two years of sobriety. And I am looking forward to many more years of sobriety in my future.
While perusing Facebook today I came across a post listing 20 items most people can find in their kitchens to aid with chronic or recurring pain. I’ve decided to post that list for you since, as my readers know I’m all about the natural remedies! Some of these I can personally attest to, such as the cider vinegar, pepermint & cloves. Others I’m definitely going to check out!
Make muscle pain a memory with ginger
When Danish researchers asked achy people to jazz up their diets with ginger, it eased muscle and joint pain, swelling and stiffness for up to 63 percent of them within two months. Experts credit ginger’s potent compounds called gingerols, which prevent the production of pain-triggering hormones. The study-recommended dose: Add at least 1 teaspoon of dried ginger or 2 teaspoons of chopped ginger to meals daily.
Cure a toothache with cloves
Got a toothache and can’t get to the dentist? Gently chewing on a clove can ease tooth pain and gum inflammation for two hours straight. A natural compound in cloves called eugenol, a powerful, natural anesthetic. Bonus: Sprinkling a ¼ teaspoon of ground cloves on meals daily may also protect your ticker. This simple action helps stabilize blood sugar, plus dampen production of artery-clogging cholesterol in as little as three weeks.
Heal heartburn with cider vinegar
Sip 1 tablespoon of apple cider vinegar mixed with 8 ounces of water before every meal, and you could shut down painful bouts of heartburn in as little as 24 hours. Cider vinegar is rich in malic and tartaric acids, powerful digestive aids that speed the breakdown of fats and proteins so your stomach can empty quickly, before food washes up into the esophagus, triggering heartburn pain.
Erase earaches with garlic
Painful ear infections drive millions of Americans to doctors’ offices every year. To cure one fast, just place two drops of warm garlic oil into your aching ear twice daily for five days. This simple treatment can clear up ear infections faster than prescription meds. Garlic’s active ingredients (germanium, selenium, and sulfur compounds) are naturally toxic to dozens of different pain-causing bacteria. To whip up your own garlic oil gently simmer three cloves of crushed garlic in a half a cup of extra virgin olive oil for two minutes, strain, then refrigerate for up to two weeks. For an optimal experience, warm this mix slightly before using so the liquid will feel soothing in your ear canal.
Chase away joint and headache pain with cherries
If you’re struggling with arthritis, gout or chronic headaches, a daily bowl of cherries could ease your ache. Anthocyanins, the compounds that give cherries their brilliant red color, are an anti-inflammatory 10 times stronger than ibuprofen and aspirin.
Fight tummy troubles with fish
If your belly always seems to be in an uproar, try munching 18 ounces of fish weekly to ease your misery. Repeated studies show that the fatty acids in fish, called EPA and DHA, can significantly reduce intestinal inflammation, cramping and belly pain and, in some cases, provide as much relief as corticosteroids and other prescription meds. For the best results, look for salmon, sardines, tuna, mackerel, trout and herring.
Prevent PMS with yogurt
Up to 80 percent of women will struggle with premenstrual syndrome and its uncomfortable symptoms, report Yale researchers. The reason: Their nervous systems are sensitive to the ups and downs in estrogen and progesterone that occur naturally every month. But snacking on 2 cups of yogurt a day can slash these symptoms by 48 percent, say researchers at New York’s Columbia University. “Yogurt is rich in calcium, a mineral that naturally calms the nervous system, preventing painful symptoms even when hormones are in flux,” explains Mary Jane Minkin, M.D., a professor of gynecology at Yale University.
Tame chronic pain with turmeric
Studies show turmeric, a popular East Indian spice, is actually three times more effective at easing pain than aspirin, ibuprofen or naproxen, plus it can help relieve chronic pain for 50 percent of people struggling with arthritis and even fibromyalgia, according to Cornell researchers. That’s because turmeric’s active ingredient, curcumin, naturally shuts down cyclooxygenase 2, an enzyme that churns out a stream of pain-producing hormones, explains nutrition researcher Julian Whitaker, M.D. and author of the book, Reversing Diabetes. The study-recommended dose: Sprinkle 1/4 teaspoon of this spice daily onto any rice, poultry, meat or vegetable dish.
End endometrial pain with oats
The ticket to soothing endometriosis pain could be a daily bowl of oatmeal. Endometriosis occurs when little bits of the uterine lining detach and grow outside of the uterus. Experts say these migrating cells can turn menstruation into a misery, causing so much inflammation that they trigger severe cramping during your period, plus a heavy ache that drags on all month long. Fortunately, scientists say opting for a diet rich in oats can help reduce endometrial pain for up to 60 percent of women within six months. That’s because oats don’t contain gluten, a trouble-making protein that triggers inflammation in many women, making endometriosis difficult to bear, explains Peter Green, M.D., professor of medicine at Colombia University.
Soothe foot pain with salt
Experts say at least six million Americans develop painful ingrown toenails each year. But regularly soaking ingrown nails in warm salt water baths can cure these painful infections within four days, say scientists at California’s Stanford University. The salt in the mix naturally nixes inflammation, plus its anti-bacterial, so it quickly destroys the germs that cause swelling and pain. Just mix 1 teaspoon of salt into each cup of water, heat to the warmest temperature that you can comfortably stand, and then soak the affected foot area for 20 minutes twice daily, until your infection subsides.
Prevent digestive upsets with pineapple
Got gas? One cup of fresh pineapple daily can cut painful bloating. That’s because pineapple is naturally packed with proteolytic enzymes, digestive aids that help speed the breakdown of pain-causing proteins in the stomach and small intestine.
Relax painful muscles with peppermint
Suffering from tight, sore muscles? What to do? Three times each week, soak in a warm tub scented with 10 drops of peppermint oil. The warm water will relax your muscles, while the peppermint oil will naturally soothe your nerves — a combo that can ease muscle cramping 25 percent more effectively than over-the-counter painkillers, and cut the frequency of future flare-ups in half.
Give your back some TLC with grapes
Got an achy back? Grapes could be the ticket to a speedy recovery. Recent studies at Ohio State University suggest eating a heaping cup of grapes daily can relax tight blood vessels, significantly improving blood flow to damaged back tissues (and often within three hours of enjoying the first bowl). That’s great news because your back’s vertebrae and shock-absorbing discs are completely dependent on nearby blood vessels to bring them healing nutrients and oxygen, so improving blood flow is essential for healing damaged back tissue, says Stengler.
Wash away pain injuries with water
Whether it’s your feet, your knees or your shoulders that are throbbing, experts at New York’s Manhattan College, say you could kick-start your recovery in one week just by drinking eight 8-ounce glasses of water daily. Why? Experts say water dilutes, and then helps flush out, histamine, a pain-triggering compound produced by injured tissues. “Plus water is a key building block of the cartilage that cushions the ends of your bones, your joints’ lubricating fluid, and the soft discs in your spine,” adds Susan M. Kleiner, Ph.D., author of the book, The Good Mood Diet. “And when these tissues are well-hydrated, they can move and glide over each other without causing pain.” One caveat: Be sure to measure your drinking glasses to find out how large they really are before you start sipping, she says. Today’s juice glasses often hold more than 12 ounces, which means five servings could be enough to meet your daily goal.
Heal sinus problems with horseradish
Latest studies show sinusitis is the nation’s number one chronic health problem. And this condition doesn’t just spur congestion and facial pain; it also makes sufferers six times more likely to feel achy all-over. Horseradish to the rescue! According to German researchers, this eye-watering condiment naturally revs up blood flow to the sinus cavities, helping to open and drain clogged sinuses and heal sinus infections more quickly than decongestant sprays do. The study-recommended dose: One teaspoon twice daily (either on its own, or used as a sandwich or meat topping) until symptoms clear.
Beat bladder infections with blueberries
Eating 1 cup of blueberries daily, whether you opt for them fresh, frozen or in juice form, can cut your risk of a urinary tract infection (UTIs). That’s because blueberries are loaded with tannins, plant compounds that wrap around problem-causing bacteria in the bladder, so they can’t get a toehold and create an infection.
Heal mouth sores with honey
Dab painful canker and cold sores with unpasteurized honey four times daily until these skin woes disappear. Raw honey’s natural enzymes zap inflammation, destroy invading viruses and speed the healing of damaged tissues.
Fight breast pain with flax
In one recent study, adding 3 tablespoons of ground flax to their daily diet eased breast soreness for one in three women within 12 weeks. Scientist’s credit flax’s phytoestrogens, natural plant compounds that prevent the estrogen spikes that can trigger breast pain. Just sprinkle ground flax on oatmeal, yogurt or applesauce, or add it to smoothies and veggie dips.
Cure migraines with coffee
Are you prone to migraines? Try muscling-up your painkiller with a coffee chaser. Whatever over-the-counter pain med you prefer, researchers at the National Headache Foundation say washing it down with a strong 12- ounce cup of coffee will boost the effectiveness of your medication by 40 percent or more. Experts say caffeine stimulates the stomach lining to absorb painkillers more quickly and more effectively.
Tame leg cramps with tomato juice
At least one in five people regularly struggle with leg cramps. The culprit is a potassium deficiency, which occur when this mineral is flushed out by diuretics, caffeinated beverages or heavy perspiration during exercise. But sip 10 ounces of potassium-rich tomato juice daily and you’ll not only speed your recovery, you’ll reduce your risk of painful cramp flare-ups in as little as 10 days.
In the quiet of my home I hear a rhythmic knocking sound.
I close my eyes and begin listening to the music
As I listen I hear other sounds chiming in.
Before I realize it I’m hearing an entire symphony of sounds,
And I know this is the music of life.
As I walk around my property I hear the frogs croaking,
The wind blowing through the trees and the crickets chirping.
All these things combine to create an orchestra of nature.
The music of life.
When I wander through the city and hear the people chatting,
The cars driving by, the busses rattling on their electric wires…
And I love the music of life.
Open your ears
Open your eyes
Learn to appreciate the beauty that is –
The music of life.