Category Archives: Poetry

The Music Of Life

In the quiet of my home I hear a rhythmic knocking sound.

I close my eyes and begin listening to the music

As I listen I hear other sounds chiming in.

Before I realize it I’m hearing an entire symphony of sounds,

And I know this is the music of life.

 

As I walk around my property I hear the frogs croaking,

The wind blowing through the trees and the crickets chirping.

All these things combine to create an orchestra of nature.

The music of life.

 

When I wander through the city and hear the people chatting,

The cars driving by, the busses rattling on their electric wires…

And I love the music of life.

 

Open your ears

Open your eyes

Learn to appreciate the beauty that is –

The music of life.

Advertisements

No More – Written Nov, 2011

I have no more joy to give,

no more happiness to send to others.

I have a hollow in my soul,

where no more positivity resides.

I have no more faith in my country,

nor in humanity itself.

I have no more smiles to share,

nor love to give.

I am empty and have no more.

To Be With Me

If you want to be with me
Lend an ear and listen my dear.
For me jewels and money won’t impress,
But a man with a golden heart I will say yes.
I don’t want another boy.
To be with me you must be a man that’ll bring me joy.
If you want me to say “forever” hold me tight.
To be with me tonight, tell me you’ll never let go.
This is all I ask of you my sweet.
To be with me let me know you love me.

Period Poem

7 am – I wake up, my mind alert my soul at peace, I’m ready to face the day.

10 am – I feel the beginnings of a migraine, nothing I can’t handle.

11 am – The migraine is raging inside my skull – lights, sounds smells bringing ever-increasing pain.

Noon – Nausea sets in, my mouth is dry my brain on fire – am I coming down with something?

3 pm – I can take no more.  I need my zen space and my bed – my day is not yet through, I must continue on.

5 pm – NAUSEA – I can feel it creeping up my throat, making my mouth water.  RUN FOR THE BATHROOM! And I purge – tomato water comes hurling out of my mouth.

7 pm – Home at last – taking some Benadryl to relax and sleep…OR NOT! Nausea again! Run for the bathroom – more tomato water mixed with Benadryl.

8 pm – My bed is calling me persuading me to rest my head and enter the dream world.  I don’t know whats wrong but sleep cures all ails.

4 am – PAIN!  EXCRUCIATING PAIN!  I’m ripped out of my dream to the reality of my uterus on fire!  I moan and curl into a ball, trying futilely to fall back asleep.  I cannot – I’m in too much pain. 

5 am – The THC gods have granted me peace.  The nausea, the pain the migraine are all abating and now I know what’s wrong with me.

Damn you Period!!!

The Complete Picture

So when I originally wrote this – It actually initially came out backwards.  By that I mean, I wrote the last verse first, then the second, then the first.  After reading it over I realized that it was backwards and should have been the way you see it here!

 

Every flaw within me – body and mind

Everything beautiful within me – heart and soul

I see the details,

I see the complete picture.

The crinkle at the corner of your eye…

The knowing you inside and out – all of you

I see the details,

I see the complete picture

The smallest worm inching along the ground…

The glory of the magnitude of the universe…

I see the details,

I see the complete picture

In my Father’s Eyes

DISCLAIMER:  This idea has been rattling around in my brain for almost a year.   I wanted to write down what my dad may have experienced as he watched his life ending.  It’s a rough draft – so probably not completed yet, but something I felt very passionate about.  September 12, 2012 was the 20th aniversary of my dad’s death – so this is in rememberance of what an amazing father he was! ENJOY!

I went to the doctor again today.  My heart is failing, my diabetes worse, my world is crashing down around me.

I’m watching my beautiful daughters, seeing their uniqueness, appreciating their differences, watching them grow – how will they turn out if I’m not here to help them become women?

My time is getting close – I can feel deaths sour breath on my neck – cold and yet comforting…a release from the pain.

My daughters are watching me.  They see my pain, they know I’ll soon be gone, their worlds will change more than they can imagine.

It’s time.  I’ve done what I can, a letter for each of my beautiful girls – a guide for the rest of their lives without me.  Dear God – please let them be ok.

It’s been a blink of an eye for me.  No more pain, no more sadness – just peace. 

 It’s been a lifetime for my girls.  All the pain, all the tears, all the joys…I’ve seen it all – they just don’t know.  I’ve been here all along – they just can’t see.

 I’m proud of what my girls have become.

Where does the Sounding Board go to be heard?

I’ve always been a good listener – a shoulder to cry on.  At times I need that in return.  This poem is about me trying to find someone to hear me for once.

I listen and more – I hear.

I empathize

I offer advice

I hold you up when you would fall

My ear – my shoulder – my heart

they will always be there for you

BUT

Where do I go – to be heard?

Where do I go – to experience empathy?

Where do I go – for advice?

Who will hold me up when I would fall?

What ear will listen and hear?

What shoulder will absorb my tears?

What heart will be open for me?

Where does the sounding board go to be heard?

Touch

Soon after becoming sober I met a man who reintroduced me to the pleasures of touch.  This poem is dedicated to him.  Thank you Jermaine for the tenderness you’ve always shown me.

For too long I’d been deprived of touch.  I’d given and given as much as I could without receiving anything in return, because it was the only way I could experience touch, which is so vital to my existence.  I didn’t know how vital.  I didn’t know I’d been starving all this time.

I’m sitting on my lovers lap.  Chest to chest, skin to skin.  His hands, so gentle carress my hair, my arms, my legs, my feet, my hips, my back.  Initially I’m slightly rigid.  Sitting very straight backed, not relaxed at all.  As the touch continues, I feel myself relaxing, begining to enjoy the touch for what it is rather then getting excited for what is to come. 

I feel myself melting.  My muscles and joints start relaxing.  I can no longer sit up straight, I put my head down on my lover’s shoulder and breathe.  I find myself breathing, deep sighs, over and over.  I lay there, silent, breathing, enjoying the touch, relaxing.  And I thank god for this moment, this touch that has been brought into my life.

EXHALE!

Year

It’s amazing to me what can change in one short year…following is a poem about this past year for me.

Battered and bruised – I’m done…I know I can only control myself so I will.

Tired with raw emotions – Ouch! For the first time the pain is truly FELT.

Learning and growing – love and light  I can see the path I’m on brightly unwinding ahead of me.

Pride and Accomplishment – Yes!  My life is bright and full of hope.  

The darkest cloud brought the brightest light.

%d bloggers like this: